My friends, we are going to take a moment today to honor a very important part of villainy: cannon fodder. If you are unfamiliar with the term, “Cannon Fodder” are brave souls whose sole purpose is to throw themselves in the way of oncoming bullets.
No evil genius, diabolical tyrant or power-crazed overlord would be complete without an endless supply of minions to throw against every hero or protagonist who dares try to oppose them.
Thus I have devised a list of the best of these endless hoards. I humbly submit to you the Greatest Videogame Cannon Fodder of All Time.
10. Prinnies
This is a shameless plug from a blatant Nippon Ichi fan. As this isn’t the number one series of all time . . . yet, I’ll explain the Disgaia series and their lovable cannon fodder briefly. Disgaia is set in the Underworld. It is full of all manner of demons and monsters. Amidst all of these powerful and dangerous creatures vying for power, there must be useless peons to do the grunt work. Prinnies are those peons. They look like penguins with fanny packs. They are actually the vessels for human souls who are atoning for the sins from their life. They use knives and bombs and overuse the word “Dood.” They are quirky and lovable and are fun to beat up. Oh, they also explode when you throw them. For more information, be sure to check out my Disgaia: Hour of Darkness review.
9. Gangs/Thugs
Ever since the golden age of Double Dragon and River City Ransom gangs and thugs have been stealing girlfriends and getting in a hero’s way; armed with guns, knives and lead pipes. No one is quite sure why they have been doing this. Have they been hired? Were they bored? Did they just need a hug? We may never know. What we do know is that they will be obtruding the paths of heroes until the end of time.
8. Koopas and Goombas
No matter what generation you grew up in, if you grew up playing videogames there is a pretty good chance you spent some quality time killing the Mario classics: Koopas and Goombas. Vicious turtles and shambling mushrooms of death have been a training ground for the untrained thumbs since 1985, with no sign of letting up. They have a warm spot in the hearts of most gamers and definitely deserve a spot on this list.